all i ever want


is THAT. 
a small space to call our own. our puppy. bare feet. plants in the window & something tasty to eat.
i want lots of light & little children everywhere.

last night i was a freak mess. everyone is having babies while my body is anti-making babies which makes me cry and cry watching Rango.
"niiiiick, the froggy died (insert sobbing here) why did the george lopez frog die?"
"he's destroying the whole town." (sob)
"nick, is rango going to be okay? i don't want him to die. (more sobbing) is the snake going to eat him?"
"where is all the water? they're all going to die. (soft cry)

apparently i have a problem with fictional characters dying. maybe that's why i never accepted bambi as a real disney movie & perhaps explains why i never got over the fact that i killed a cat when i was a kid. (don't ask.)(alliteration?)

all of the sudden you're swamped with a to-do list, it's finals week so you never see your husband, the car you've been using dies, your school won't process your financial aid or your transfer credit and you have no idea what you're doing. some days you just have to cry.

but life is beautiful & we move on, with dreams of spaghetti-o's & hope for the future.
here's to a better today, every day.

"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."


  1. I go through phases every so often where I am really sensitive that I have not gotten pregnant yet. and whenever one of my friends announces that they are pregnant, I take it personal. But I finally realized, why the heck am I taking it personal? My motto for the last two years has been, "Everyone's story is different." I feel like I've finally gotten to a place where I want to live out our story and not anyone else's. Eventually we'll have kids and we will get to that place and I will realize the Lord knows SO much better than I do what we need and when we need it. I hope it gets easier for you and that you are happy with whatever life brings you!

  2. oh gosh, this post seriously spoke to me. so ridiculous, those girl hormones we have. first off, that picture is so dreamy, and definitely something i'm dreaming about. second, i cry too easily for fictional character. i never allow myself to watch bambi. sometimes even the lion king.
    hope everything is going smoothly now that finals are coming to an end!!
    xo TJ

  3. Love your blog! And Yes, every now and then you need a good cry! Makes me feel better afterwards. That kitchen looks blissful. I would love to have a kitchen exactly like this. So serene. Excited to be following you :)

    Bennett Love

  4. So glad to know I'm not the only one. Finals will be conquered, and we will have summer soon (after two dreadful finals tomorrow, my summer will begin!)
    Anyways, I so enjoy your blog :) I'm a Jesus-loving, communications-studying, dog-owning gal from TN.
    Things will look up, in the meantime keep shining,